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apparentparadoxHow do you know if you are bowing to societal pressure, or if you're doing something that you want for your own reasons?
In general, I try very hard to make up my own mind about things, rather than going with "the norm" or what advertisers have been pushing. It's pretty easy when what you want is obviously different from the current trend/fad, but what do you do if what you think you want aligns with the current trends?
With respect to going bald, the answer was easy. Anything that would get rid of the baldness would be some kind of extreme item -- either very costly (implants, etc.), or require an ongoing commitment (rogaine), or something that probably doesn't really hide the fact that I'm bald (comb-over, toupee). So, even though I hate being bald, I just deal with it. If there were a simple, inexpensive, one-time treatment that would cure my baldness, I'd probably do it -- not because our society is against bald people, but because it would mean that I wouldn't have to worry about always wearing a hat.
Right now, though, I'm struggling with a different societal pressure: being tanned.
A street festival will be held in SF at the end of July. At this event, many people will be walking around without shirts on. In the past, I've also attended this event without a shirt on. Many (most?) of the caucasians attending will be wearing the bronzed tan look that so many people identify with as "healthy". It may simply be the fact that I have been indoctrinated by the media for years (after all, years ago, "pale" was the preferred look), but to me, a tanned body generally looks better than a pale body, and especially tanned fat looks more attractive than pale fat.
So, what am I to do? I don't want to have a "real" tan (too worried about skin cancer, etc. to do that), but there is the possibility of some kind of "fake" tan. On the one hand, making myself look tan isn't much different from me wearing a nice suit occasionally, or choosing clothes based on whether the color works well with my skin tones, or even having my hair cut in a particular way -- those are all things that I do to change my appearance in a way that I feel that I look better.
Or does the illusion of a tan send the wrong message -- that I'm willing to go along with society's idea of what is attractive?
I'm pretty sure that if I attend this event looking all tanned that I will feel better about my looks during that day. But, will I be happier overall? If I don't get a tan, then there isn't any dilemma. If I do, though, how will I ever know if I've done the "right thing"?
In general, I try very hard to make up my own mind about things, rather than going with "the norm" or what advertisers have been pushing. It's pretty easy when what you want is obviously different from the current trend/fad, but what do you do if what you think you want aligns with the current trends?
With respect to going bald, the answer was easy. Anything that would get rid of the baldness would be some kind of extreme item -- either very costly (implants, etc.), or require an ongoing commitment (rogaine), or something that probably doesn't really hide the fact that I'm bald (comb-over, toupee). So, even though I hate being bald, I just deal with it. If there were a simple, inexpensive, one-time treatment that would cure my baldness, I'd probably do it -- not because our society is against bald people, but because it would mean that I wouldn't have to worry about always wearing a hat.
Right now, though, I'm struggling with a different societal pressure: being tanned.
A street festival will be held in SF at the end of July. At this event, many people will be walking around without shirts on. In the past, I've also attended this event without a shirt on. Many (most?) of the caucasians attending will be wearing the bronzed tan look that so many people identify with as "healthy". It may simply be the fact that I have been indoctrinated by the media for years (after all, years ago, "pale" was the preferred look), but to me, a tanned body generally looks better than a pale body, and especially tanned fat looks more attractive than pale fat.
So, what am I to do? I don't want to have a "real" tan (too worried about skin cancer, etc. to do that), but there is the possibility of some kind of "fake" tan. On the one hand, making myself look tan isn't much different from me wearing a nice suit occasionally, or choosing clothes based on whether the color works well with my skin tones, or even having my hair cut in a particular way -- those are all things that I do to change my appearance in a way that I feel that I look better.
Or does the illusion of a tan send the wrong message -- that I'm willing to go along with society's idea of what is attractive?
I'm pretty sure that if I attend this event looking all tanned that I will feel better about my looks during that day. But, will I be happier overall? If I don't get a tan, then there isn't any dilemma. If I do, though, how will I ever know if I've done the "right thing"?