![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Mirror, mirror
Dec. 10th, 2006 04:27 pmA long-time friend recently put some pictures on flickr from the March on Washington in 1987. There are a couple of pictures of Mark & me in the set. Looking at those pictures of me so many years ago, I can say that I was somewhat attractive back then. I know that back in '87 when they were taken, I wouldn't have thought myself attractive.
If I look at pictures of myself today, I definitely don't think that I'm attractive.
Yes, there is the whole body image stuff that is going on. But I also think that in some ways, it's more internal than that. When I look at pictures of me from the distant past, I think that I tend to evaluate purely on the basis of the physical, and to dissociate from the person in the picture. When I look in the mirror, or in current pictures, I think that I evaluate more on the basis of internal mental things -- I'm not good enough/smart enough/friendly enough, etc.
Perhaps others never have the problem of having a low self-image, or they have already figured out that they are evaluating their internal mental state more than their physical state when they view current pictures of themselves. But, this was the first time this thought came to me.
If I look at pictures of myself today, I definitely don't think that I'm attractive.
Yes, there is the whole body image stuff that is going on. But I also think that in some ways, it's more internal than that. When I look at pictures of me from the distant past, I think that I tend to evaluate purely on the basis of the physical, and to dissociate from the person in the picture. When I look in the mirror, or in current pictures, I think that I evaluate more on the basis of internal mental things -- I'm not good enough/smart enough/friendly enough, etc.
Perhaps others never have the problem of having a low self-image, or they have already figured out that they are evaluating their internal mental state more than their physical state when they view current pictures of themselves. But, this was the first time this thought came to me.